Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair. – Hair
What does one do when held prisoner by the rain for two whole days? What’s the best way to liven up the first official (crummy) week of summer vacation? Why, you cut your own hair, silly!
How delightfully naughty it is to grasp those Crayola safety scissors and, emboldened by your big brother, begin that first snip. Actually, given your choice of scissor, the more appropriate description of what you did might be “hack” and “saw”. Yes, that is precisely what you did to that first chunk of hair. Those safety scissors are so far from sharp. With their assistance, you effectively created a series of jagged frizzy clumps.
I’ll hand it to you, that section right in front of your eyes is hot. Who needed that five inches of hair anyhow? Not Gwen! She didn’t stop there either. Clearly, she was girl consumed. By the end of her haircut she had removed five to eight inch lengths of hair from various points around her head. She didn’t discriminate. She wisely cut just the very top layers, leaving what the chicest of four year old’s might consider hair-turned-art. One might even call it edgy…trendsetting, if you will. Why, when she passes the other girls at Gymboree, they’ll sigh with envy at the sophistication of Gwen’s freshly cleaved tresses. (Excuse me while I go clear this lump of sarcasm from my throat.)
Imagine a style that encompasses all of the major styles of the late 20th century and that’s what Gwen has so artfully created. A little bit of Farrah, a skosh of the Achy Breaky and hearty nod toward the Jennifer, circa Friends, 1995.
They didn’t tell me about Friday’s styling session. I first noticed on Saturday morning as I brushed her (once gorgeous) locks before a birthday party.
“I love it!” she declared.
Daddy found the hair piled in the bathroom wastebasket. As if we wouldn’t see it there. I found more on the playroom floor, more still in the hallway and finally, this afternoon I discovered one 8 inch length hidden beneath the drop leaf table at the bottom of the stairs.
As much as I’d love to provide you with a picture of her new ‘do, I can’t. She has been successfully dodging the Paparazzi since Saturday.